About

I am a fairly ordinary person, married and father of several adult children.

Now retired and happy and with grandchildren.

I enjoy a lot of the things that would be seen as typical of many men as well as disliking just as many other things considered of interest to men.

Transgender is only part of who I apparently am and part of my life journey but it is a new and significant part of me. And as it has only recently become apparent to me, it is still something that I have not fully come to grips with and how best to integrate it into the rest of my life.

Any suggestions anyone?

The realisation has  come relatively late in life that crossdressing is a necessary part of understanding who I am. Sharing that understanding with others is difficult for me and for those I love.

Until I work out what this all means I have discontinued dressing. But the need has not abated.

Still it has opened my eyes to the marvels of human diversity and both the difficulties and the wonderful joys of being human and how much more there is to me and to life than I could have imagined some years ago.

4 thoughts on “About

  1. Hello Geraldine! I really hope you start to update your blog more; I’m really curious to see what you have discovered about yourself! I find it simply awesome that you can, at will, ‘discontinue dressing’ — it sounds so easy when you put it that way. I most certainly cannot ‘stop’ it like that, even though I admit that my life would be so much easier if I could…

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    1. Hello Sandra and thank you so much for your two posts.Yes I really must write further on this strange aspect of my life.
      Yes I have given up crossdressing and you make me sound so strong willed.Not really.It was and still is very very difficult. I can attest like most who need to dress,the urge does not go away.
      I decided not to dress because I was shocked at the response of my wife and children to my need to dress. I could never have predicted the heat of their feelings even though all my children are well educated and several are doctors.
      Such a promise necessitated me seeking help from a wonderful psychologist who was interested in what I could not do as a man but could do when released from the male role. I think this gave me a valuable insight because dressing did allow me to feel beautiful for the first time in my life and also to allow myself to become vulnerable and relate more effectively with people, male and female. This has remained ever since and I think I am a gentler, nicerand more outgoing person.
      But how do I now live as a crossdresser without dressing?
      I still buy clothes. I still observe what women around me wear, wanting to emulate them. I suppose I now dress vicariously through you and all the other sites I follow. I also read your blog and other thoughtful blogged writings. I still see myself as a crossdresser somewhere on the trans curve.
      And while it has been as difficult as anything I have ever experienced, it has been the most wonderful thing ever to have happened to me.
      And I still have a family.
      My mum died last weekend after a short illness. When I told her of my dressing several years ago, while she could not understand it she accepted it and me. A special woman! I thanked her just before she died for her acceptance and love.
      So, I will write more on this site because I have already learned a considerable amount about my gender, my need to be broader than the restricted person I used be and even about my God.
      Not bad learning these things from a sudden wanting to wear high heels, a dress and makeup.
      Thanks again for your interest and for your wonderful blogs.
      Geraldine

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  2. Hi Geraldine, I’ve dealt with this same condition all my life but have only cross dressed years ago a couple of times. And like you say the desire doesn’t go away. And like you I use the virtual world as a vehicle to express my fem side which has been a lot of fun for me. In the physical world there is a lot of attachment which means pain and a lot of growth can happen. Bringing this condition into the material world certainly is a way of growing and becoming aware. But it certainly isn’t the only way to become aware and I have gotten to the point where I am comfortable expressing myself in the virtual world without cross dressing.

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    1. Hello Suzzymilkmaid, Thank you so much for finding my embarrassingly still embroyonic site and for leaving me a message. I am very relaxed about discovering this need within me. It was as I have written that hit me at 59 years of age but now looking back it makes sense of a range of things in my life that I never connected.
      Now that comfort doesn’t extend to crossdressing itself because of the lack of acceptance by my wife and family. Thus the use of the net (internet not fishnet!) as a way of coping. We all manage our need to dress and feel feminine as best we can.
      I trust your journey fulfills you and that you learn much about yourself as you grow.. It’s just a pity that crossdressing and the pressures it applies to the understanding of gender those around us have, causes so much anxt. There have to be easier roads to travel, especially in our 4 inch heels!
      Geraldine

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